Santa must've put me on the "nice" list!

I had a fantastic Christmas. I was depressed for weeks beforehand about not being with my family on Christmas for the first time ever. It turns out that it wasn't so bad.

I got to spend several days with Philip (who is wonderful, always). We also had Skype video dates with both of our families so that we could see people open presents and just "be" with our families for the holiday. It worked out really well. I still missed my family and wish that I could be with them, but I was content in my situation. I really am very fortunate.

Also, Santa brought me a TON of awesome gifts. ;) There wasn't really anything in particular that I was asking for (besides the treadmill that Philip got me in November), so I wasn't expecting a whole lot. I was in for quite a treat! I got a bunch of books and movies (which are always great presents for me!) and I also got a breadmaker and a Kitchenaid mixer (I'm going be a baking Queen!). On top of all that, I also got 2 hockey pucks autographed by Matt Duchene (my favorite Avs player -- GO AVS!) and a new Avs jersey along with an Avs Mr. Potato-head (complete with mullet and toothless grin!). Philip and I also got a new camera from my parents. It is a spectacular camera; we both love it! It's a Canon PowerShot SX20IS 12.1MP Digital

Camera. It takes great photos and I love, love, love the zoom capabilities. :) We also got some new Halloween decorations (only 308 days left!).

The dogs got each of us a new knit cap to keep our heads warm... they, of course, are cute Avalanche hats! Here we are in our new, beautiful hats:

Phew! That's a lot of Christmas gifts! We are definitely spoiled. I don't mind though. ;) I hope that Santa brought each of you everything that was on your wishlist... unless you were naughty. In that case, try to be a better person this year! XD Happy holidays to all!

Marriage

I am incredibly fortunate. I have a wonderful partner. He loves, understands, and supports me. He is caring and generous. He is smart and funny. He is my perfect partner. We have chosen to marry and, thankfully, our marriage is supported. My family loves Philip and his family loves me. We have been very lucky.

We are especially lucky that the government has chosen not to invade our privacy and interfere in our relationship. That's because we are a heterosexual, monogamous relationship. I could not imagine if I would have fallen in love with a woman or if I chose to have a polygamous marriage.

I believe that people should be able to marry whoever they choose. So long as the marriage is between consenting adults, I don't think the government should be able to intervene. I don't care if it is between a man and a woman, two men, two woman, or between 5 different people. If the people involved in that marriage consent to the marriage, the government should butt out.

I don't understand how the government can presume to tell people that homosexuals cannot marry... especially when marriage is becoming a farce as it is. Heterosexuals are doing a fine job of ruining marriage as it is, so I don't see what harm there would be in letting homosexuals marry. I mean, adultery and divorce are sins as well, but I don't see the government trying to make those things illegal either (or at least enforcing laws forbidding those sins).

Who decides which sin is worse? And who decides which ridiculous laws the government is going to try to push? It seems to me that if the government were really trying to act in "defense of marriage," they would outlaw divorce. Wouldn't that make more sense? Don't get me wrong. I am against marriage but I do understand that there are legitimate reasons for divorce (I just wish people didn't get married at the drop of a hat so that marriage would not end in divorce so often). However, I think that divorce does a lot more damage to the idea of marriage than homosexuality does.

There are so many loveless, sexless, hopeless marriages that the government does not try to control... so why should they interfere in a marriage just because 2 men or 2 women are marrying? Who is to say that 2 women or 2 men cannot be just as happy (or happier) than the typical heterosexual couple?

I cannot imagine someone telling me that I could not marry Philip. How would you feel if someone told you that you could not marry your soulmate? It is outrageous.

I know that a lot of people who support gay marriage do not support polygamy. I do. I am not saying that polygamy is going to work for every family. However, I think that people should be able to make their own decisions on how to form their families (within reason -- no family should be allowed to harm their spouse(s) or child(ren)). I think it could be perfectly reasonable for man to have more than one wife or for a woman to have more than one husband. Think of the financial gains for having more than one or two breadwinners in a family. Think of the added help with household chores. Think of the added support for the children in the family.

I know that most people think of the clans that do horrible things to women and children, but this does not have to be the way all polygamous families work. Those clans are disgusting. That's not what I mean when I talk about polygamy. I don't want to see forced marriages or abuse. I'm just saying that polygamy could work in a healthy way.

There is a huge adultery problem in the U.S. I do not condone it, and I would never cheat on my partner, but there is a part of me who understands why some people do seek sex outside of their marriage. People crave variety. If there were multiple partners in a family, that desire for variety could possibly be met (maybe).

Again, I don't think this would work for everyone (or even most people). I don't know very many people who I think could handle a polygamous lifestyle. It would require a certain kind of person to understand and not become jealous of the other wives/husbands in the family. However, I think that people who can be a part of a healthy, polygamous family should be able to do so.

Blech! Now that I've got that all out of my system, I feel much better. Please do comment on the post whether you agree or disagree with anything I've said here. I look forward to seeing opinions! :)

Trust and Secrets

I am not a person of many secrets. I mean, I keep to myself for the most part, but there aren't a lot of juicy details that people would really care about anyway. However, there are a few secrets that I have and hold dear. There are not many people that I would trust with those secrets.

There is one secret in particular that I told someone. I expected that person to keep my confidence and not tell anyone that secret. I thought that my trust was well placed considering that it was my own father that I told. I was wrong.

It came to my attention today that my dad told my secret to not just one person, but SEVERAL people. Not only that, but those people are known for not being able to keep secrets themselves. Why? I don't really know. My mom says it's because he just can't keep a secret. I don't see that as an adequate excuse.

I am fuming. First of all, just because someone told the secret. Second of all, because it was my dad. There are few people that I trust as it is. That's one less person.

Not only that, but now I can't have my mother as a confidant either because I know that she will tell my dad any secrets that I tell her. I understand that. I tell Philip everything. However, I also know that I can trust Philip to never tell a soul if I ask him not to.

I don't care if you don't think a secret is important or not. You should never give up a person's secrets. If someone tells me something in confidence, I will take it to my grave. I have held other people's secrets for years. I don't understand how people can break their friend's or family member's trust so easily.

I am angry. I am hurt. My muscles are all tense and my head is killing me because of it. I just don't understand.

My Views: Religion

Recently, I have been asked quite often what exactly I believe when it comes to religion. My views are simple but complex. And, what I mean by that is, I am still not solidly sure as to exactly what I believe. So, technically I guess you would define me as agnostic.

I believe in a higher being. I choose to call that higher being God. I used to be Christian. However, I could not believe in many tenants of the religion. The biggest thing being the resurrection. Even after I accepted that I was a heretic (at the very least), I still held out hope that I could be a Christian. There is a lot of pressure in our country for people to be Christian. Others are different and looked down upon. Besides that, I was comfortable with that title. It's what I had always been. It was scary to think about being something other than Christian.

Peer pressure and comfort weren't the only reasons I stayed. I love Jesus. I believe that Jesus existed; I know that he was a real person. And, I think that the teachings of Jesus were wonderful and amazing. He showed real love towards his fellow humans. He was compassionate and understanding and forgiving. He was a truly good person. I just couldn't believe that he was anything more than human.

So, I clung to that title of Christian. It was only just recently that I accepted that I am not really Christian. I accept that I am agnostic. On a good day, I consider myself a pluralist. I take the ideas that I like from all sorts of religions and use them to make sense of the higher being that I believe in. There are ideas that I believe in from Christianity to Buddhism to Islam to Hinduism to Judaism and many other religions.

I am (and always have been) fascinated by religion (probably why I ended up being a Religion & Philosophy major in college). Lately I have not spent as much time pondering religion. I think that it is out of business and fear. First, I've got a lot going on, so there isn't as much time for pondering. Second, I've become fearful that if I look closely, I may come too close to the line between atheism and agnosticism. I don't want to lose my belief in a higher being. But, as of late, I've been less and less able to come up with reasons why I still believe.

I guess I am just going on faith. So, for the time being, I believe in a higher being. I don't really know much beyond that. I try to be as good of a human being as I can be (despite the fact that I don't believe in heaven or hell -- I don't think that a good and loving God would send anyone to hell and I just can't fathom a heaven after life).

I am currently content to exist as agnostic. I am living my life without knowing... but, in reality, who can really KNOW.