The Big Day

We are moving in 30 days. We will be leaving for Denver on June 26th. It is now May 27th. Less than a month to go.

Honestly, I am getting a little scared. However, I'm also SO ready to do this.

I cannot wait to live with my pups again. I know I can probably find a job pretty quickly. I know that Philip and I will be okay.

It's just the fact that we are leaving for good. I will likely never live in North Carolina again. It hasn't been perfect for me here, but it has become home.

I know that Colorado will be a better fit for me. I have just had a lot of good times here. And, I've made my only true friends here in North Carolina. However, most of those friends have now moved on as well.

The only things that are really tearing at me are the memories. And there have been so many. Good and bad. But, either way, they have been my life for the past 6 years.

I know that I will miss North Carolina. Just as I miss Indiana. I will miss them for the memories that I have of them. But, I know that neither can be my true home. I need to go out and find that place that is perfect for me. And for my family: Philip and my pups and our future family. I think that I will find that in Colorado.

School? Maybe...

So, I've been giving my current situation a lot of thought. I really dislike my current job. It's completely unfulfilling and a pain. Most people probably know that I've been struggling to decide what I'm actually going to do with my life. Well, a while back I figured out what I really want to do: be a stay at home mom. But, since that's still several years down the road, I figured I should probably find something else to do with my life until then. lol

Joe and I spoke recently and we both think it would be a good idea for me to leave my job. He doesn't want me to be miserable either. :) The problem with that is that there aren't really many jobs out there that will allow me to pay my bills and still eat. :S Joe suggested that I go back to school. The problem with that was that I didn't really know what I would go back for. I mean, didn't I already say that I don't know what I want to do with my life for the time being??

Well, I've given it a lot of thought, and I think I may be decided. I'd like to go back to get my degree in Therapeutic Massage. It's something completely different from what I'm doing now, I'd actually be helping people, I would be working with lots of different people, and it would actually pay the bills. There are multiple different programs that I could do. They could take anywhere from 2 semesters to 17 months.

Okay, now for the problem with this: How am I going to be able to pay for this and afford to live?? haha... that, my friends, is my current dilemma. It's time to sit down and do some serious figuring. It's probably going to require a lot of sacrifice... especially since I'm currently pretty spoiled (I've had quite a bit of extra income in recent months because I had a downgrade in rent/utilities... due to the fact that my apartment is tiny and craptastic).

If I went back to school, I would have an odd schedule during the day, which would mean that I would have to find a job working nights/weekends. That also sucks, because it's pretty much the only time I see Philip. Also, those jobs tend to pay crap. Yuck.

So, I'm pretty frightened of what may be to come, but I'm also really excited that I may actually be stepping in the right direction to find some meaning in my work/life. :)

Don't kill yourself yet...

Haha... so, my previous post was very depressing, but something good has happened. And, it came out of the state of Iowa.

Gay marriage is now allowed in the great state of Iowa. Finally, something progressive for the midwest! :)

Of course, this may not last. California only had legal gay marriage for 5 months before it was taken away. And California is typically very liberal. Iowa may have more difficulty holding on since it's in such a conservative area of the U.S. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it sticks. And, I hope that this causes other states to see that homosexuals have the right to be married as well. I won't hold my breath just yet, though.

I came across a blog from a friend of mine from high school. She was actually bi-curious/bisexual before. Now, it seems that she has found conservative Christianity and thinks that gays should not be allowed access to any sort of marriage. She thinks that if people are gay, they should abstain from relationships.

She feels that the United States should not encourage sins. She said that if we are going to make gay marriage legal that we might as well make murder legal. Because all sins are equal.

I've come across more and more people like this. I'm frightened. It seems as though they just caught the Crazy-ass Conservative Christian flu. I don't want to catch it. I sure hope all of that vitamin C I get in my diet can fight it off.

I told her that the U.S. isn't a Christian nation, and therefore, we can't make laws based on Christianity's idea of what is right. Homosexuality is not hurting anyone (unless you believe that they are going to hell, in which case it's still only hurting them -- you can only tell them your beliefs; not make them believe... otherwise we could just make it a law that everyone in the U.S. has to be a Christian). Murder is taking a life. Big difference.

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! These are scary times we are living in. Everyone keep your fingers crossed that you don't catch that flu.