You can also check out my wedding blog, Tara Getting Married. It has lots of DIY wedding information!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

A day I dread...

I have a doctor appointment later today. I dread days like these. I don't know what is wrong with me, therefore, I do not know what they'll have to do to me. And doctors tend to rely on tests to figure out what is wrong with me. And lots of tests use needles. And I hate needles. I have an irrational fear of needles and other sharp objects. Mostly needles. It's called belonephobia. I hyperventilate when someone tries to give me a shot or take blood or anything else involving a needle. This is especially bad considering the reason I am going to the doctor.

I can't breathe. lol... so I'm sure hyperventilating would not help the situation. I have always had difficulty breathing. Those of you who have been around me a lot have probably noticed that I "sigh" regularly. This is me trying to get air because I don't feel that I'm getting enough. It used to be that I only had this probably when I was stressed out. I could just relax and take a few deep breaths and I would be fine. Now, I am not under stress, but I can't breathe. I try to take deep breaths, but I don't feel that it's working. I feel like I'm not getting enough air.

This has been going on for about 2 months now. I've been trying to forget about it, but I finally had a breakdown on Monday night because I was getting stressed out about it (that doesn't help my breathing!). I haven't been sleeping because I haven't been able to breathe. Joe is making me go to the doctor. I don't have insurance, so I have to pay out of pocket, so I was trying to see if it would just go away! It didn't. And now I have an appointment to find out what's wrong with me.

I did some research online. There are several things it could be. The dust in our house while we were remodeling could have triggered asthma. I could be anemic. I may just be insane. :) lol... hopefully I'll find out soon, though. And without needles. :S

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