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Monday, February 23, 2009

Blah, blah, blah

So, I'm bored. I dislike my job. I want to quit, but I cannot. I need the money (I would complain about the mortgage payment but I love the house too much to do so). The economy is beyond sucking. So, I cannot find another job. It pretty much blows. A lot. I've been trying to stay positive about my job. It's hard to do though. I'm sick of it. At least I have my Fridays off now. It makes it much easier to tolerate.

Even though I am currently stuck, I've been trying to think about what I want to do with my life. What have I come up with? Nothing. I have no idea. I'm completely lost. What do I want to do with my life? A million different things. I've thought about going to seminary. I've thought about becoming a cop (weird, huh?!). I've thought about becoming a nurse (scary considering the fact that I'm a belonephobiac). Most of what I've really thought about requires more education. I'm kind of, sort of ready to go back to school... almost. But, I couldn't go back to school right now even if I was ready because of financial reasons.

What I'm dreaming about now is finishing this book and then it creating enough income for myself so that I can stay at home and just write. I know... it's incredibly unlikely. And even if it does happen, I'm sure it will not be for a long time. Especially since I have very little motivation to do much writing. I'm doing a lot of reading right now, but very litting writing. I need to get going in a higher gear. It's just hard to be motivated when I'm feeling lousy about the job and feeling so unsure about where my life is headed.

Ugh. At least things are getting better. I'm watching more of what I eat and I'm getting enough exercise. I've lost some weight. I look better. I'm just waiting for my mind to follow the lead of my body. :)

2 comments:

Jon and Aileen said...

Man, even though you already told me this, I'm sorry to read it again. :( I wish you luck in all your soul-searching endevours. I told Jon to go on a vision-quest, and I pass the same advice on to you :)

how 'bout you just take my job? :)

Lyn said...

haha... well, I would love to help you out and take your job. Unfortunately, I would be very unhappy there without my 4 beautiful pups. :( Also, Joe might have a problem with that. ;)